Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Fictional death of Joey Ramone

A person walks alone through the super market at 11 p.m. feeling
different degrees of loneliness. It is always when you are alone in a
grocery store when these feelings seem to appear out of nowhere. This
person has been playing in a band for twenty something years. At this
rate it seems pointless to keep track of things like this. He has
played hundreds of concerts and made dozens of records but when he thinks about these things at this moment it seems
funny and kind of silly. His band is called The Ramones and his
name is Joey Ramone.

"I don't wanna get old" Joey said to himself when he got outside to
the parking lot of a grocery store. He never wanted any of this. He
grew old and tired and was diagnosed with some bad medical thing.
There was no escaping this thing and it seemed incredibly depressing
to him. Joey Ramone stood still for a minute, before entering his 1977
Ford GTO and admired the glow of the street lamps. He could feel his
insides shaking and got one weird burst of energy out of nowhere. Reaching for his BB gun but realizing it was too far, he clenched his fist and groaned.
He lost all his strength and spilled out from the GTO and onto the pavement below.
He laid there on the ground for a long time thinking about nothing and it
felt good just sort of looking at the tires of his car and the grey
faded cement. After lying like this for awhile, a grocery
store employee got off from work and saw him and called an ambulance.

He wakes up in the hospital and immediately regrets waking up. Some of
his family members were beside him and looking at him in a strange and
distant way. He hated that they would come and look at him like this.
They brought to his hospital room a boom box and were playing music.
His family did not have the same taste in music as Joey did and he
wished they hadn't brought music. They were playing terrible things
and at the moment the worst, U2. To think that one could
go through a whole life of doing cool shit and then die like this. Why
did they come here and bring Bono with them? It was beyond his
comprehension and he decided to give up trying to understand
it. Joey Ramone deeply regretted having woken up at all because it
would have been better to die when asleep and in a dream. U2 did not
stop playing. Almost the entire album played and when it was towards
the end he could not take it anymore. Joey Ramone moaned and then
died. It was a sad day for the world. Joey Ramone did not die listening to U2 willingly.


this was an old story i wrote and found in my email.
for awhile i liked to make up fictional death's of my hero's.
joey ramone is one of my hero's and when i saw on wikipedia that he died listening to U2 i thought it would be funny to write a story about how that was the case, but he was not happy about it.

i haven't wrote anything since last september. no songs or stories.
just feel kinda vacant all the time and then crazy sometimes.
when i feel vacant i sit and watch people.
when i feel crazy i get drunk then fall asleep.

i finished putting together a compilation of songs recorded at total trash.
it's called "space trash" and i put it out on tape.
i tried to put it online but couldn't figure that out.
if anyone wants one, let me know.

1 comment:

  1. Really enjoyed the story. I miss you!
    I would love a tape :) How would I go about getting one? My e-mail address is: sidewalkends @ gmail .com
    Hope all is well and wonderful!